Domestic abuse

Domestic abuse occurs not only in intimate relationships but also within family dynamics.

Types of domestic violence:

• Intimate Partner Violence (IPV): Violence between current or former spouses or dating partners, with or without a shared child. This can happen in heterosexual or same-sex relationships and doesn’t require sexual intimacy. IPV varies widely, from isolated incidents to chronic severe abuse.
• Non-Intimate Partner Violence: Violence between family members, such as parents and adult children, siblings, step-relatives, or grandparents and adult grandchildren.

Domestic violence extends beyond victims, affecting family, friends, coworkers, witnesses, and the community. Children exposed to domestic violence face heightened risks of social and physical issues and may come to view violence as normal, increasing their chances of becoming future victims or abusers.

Consider these questions about your relationship(s):

• Embarrass or belittle you in front of others?
• Undermine your achievements or decisions?
• Use threats or intimidation to control you?
• Treat you roughly—grab, push, pinch, shove or hit you?
• Constantly monitor your whereabouts or isolate you from loved ones?
• Blame you for their actions or pressure you sexually?
• Prevent you from doing things you want – like spending time with friends or family?
• Make you feel trapped in the relationship?
• Use drugs or alcohol as an excuse for abusive behaviour?

Do you:

• Feel scared of your partner’s behaviour?
• Make excuses for their actions?
• Change yourself to avoid conflict?
• Stay out of fear of what might happen if you leave?

Understanding Intersectionality

Intersectionality explains how different aspects of a person’s identity—like race, gender, sexuality, or disability—overlap and interact to shape their experiences, especially regarding discrimination or inequality. For example, a Black woman might face both racial and gender discrimination at the same time, making her experience different from that of a Black man or a white woman. This approach helps us see that no one is defined by just one part of who they are; their life is shaped by many interconnected factors. Recognising these overlaps is key to fully understanding and addressing inequality.

Our commitment at SNG

At SNG, we are committed to raising awareness about domestic abuse and its impact on everyone, taking into account the additional challenges faced by people with characteristics protected under the Equality Act 2010. These include age, disability, gender reassignment, marriage and civil partnership, pregnancy and maternity, race, religion or belief, sex, and sexual orientation.

The role of service providers

Local authorities and housing providers have a responsibility to understand and address intersectionality. This means recognising the barriers within their services that prevent equal access and taking action to create policies and practices that break these barriers. Special attention must be given to ensuring services are accessible to all victims/survivors, especially those from Black and marginalised communities.

By acknowledging and addressing these intersecting challenges, we can better support victims/survivors of domestic abuse and work toward more inclusive and effective safety planning.

Disabled people experience higher rates of domestic abuse than non-disabled people.

Disabled women are twice as likely to experience abuse than non-disabled women, and disabled people are more likely to experience abuse from an adult family member compared to non-disabled people (14% vs 6%). Studies have shown that disabled women are twice as likely to experience domestic abuse and also twice as likely to suffer assault and rape. Yet our MARAC [Multi Agency Risk Assessment Conference] data shows that nationally only 3.9% of referrals were for disabled victims, significantly lower than our recommendation of 16% or higher Our research also shows low referral rates for disabled people into domestic abuse services.

• 3.3 years is the average time disabled clients experience domestic abuse before accessing support (compared to 2.2 years for non-disabled clients)
• 22% of disabled clients who are experiencing domestic abuse have previously planned or attempted suicide
• 37%of disabled people suffer abuse from a current partner compared to 28% of non-disabled victims

People with disabilities may also experience domestic abuse including intimate partners, family members, personal care assistants and health care professionals. Disabled people encounter differing dynamics of domestic abuse, which may include more severe coercion, control or abuse from carers. Abuse can also happen when someone withholds, destroys or manipulates medical equipment, access to communication, medication, personal care, meals and transportation.

Lack of accessibility to support

The lack of a sign language translator, information which is not available in audio or large print, or a staircase only entrance, all disable the individual from engaging with services in the same way as people without impairments.

Accessibility barriers can also be cultural: if staff aren’t trained to consider the needs of people with impairments and if they aren’t trained about domestic violence, then they will not be able to support the people who need them most.

Someone who is disabled and experiencing domestic abuse may find it harder to protect themselves, access sources of help, or remove themselves from the abusive situation; the disabled person may be reliant on the abuser for personal care or mobility.

If you think you or someone you know is a victim of domestic abuse while being disabled, contact Scope by visiting their website, calling their helpline on 0808 800 3333, or emailing them at helpline@scope.org.uk. 

Financial abuse is one of the most prevalent forms of older people abuse and is where someone in a position of trust interferes in an older person’s ability to acquire, use or maintain their finances. It is always a crime but not always prosecuted. Financial abuse often occurs alongside other forms of abuse. 

Financial abuse can include: 

• money being stolen or misused 
• fraud 
• exploiting someone's financial affairs 
• restricting someone's access to money, employment or possessions 
• pressuring and coercing someone about their will, lasting power of attorney, property or inheritance. 

While financial abuse can look very different for different people, there are signs of financial abuse you can look out for, either in your own life or if you're worried about a friend, relative or neighbour. Think about the answers to the following questions: 

• Have you noticed unusual or inappropriate transactions on your bank statements? 
• Are you unable to access cash, either via banking or income sources, such as your pension or other benefits? 
• Are you being pressured into giving your money to others, leaving you without the money you need to pay for essentials? 
• Have you recently lost money without any explanation? 
• Have you lent money to someone, and they haven't given it back? 
• Do you feel pressured or forced into making changes to your will or other financial plans? 

If you think you or someone you care about is a victim of financial abuse, contact Hourglass by visiting their website  or by calling their 24/7 helpline on 0808 808 8141. 

'Honour' based abuse is driven by the belief that the 'honour' of a family or community needs to be protected and any 'shame' avoided - often at any cost, even a life. It can include child marriage, virginity testing, enforced abortion, and forced marriage, as well as physical, sexual and economic abuse, and coercive control.

It is more prevalent within communities from South Asia, the Middle East, and North and East Africa, and reports of 'honour' based abuse come from Muslim, Sikh, Hindu, Orthodox Jewish and occasionally traveller communities. Both perpetrators and victims can be male or female.

Research suggests that at least one ‘honour’ killing occurs in the UK every month - yet this type of domestic abuse is still widely misunderstood and under-reported, so the true scale of the problem isn't known.

Karma Nirvana specialise in supporting anyone affected by 'honour' based abuse and their helpline is available on 0800 5999 247 from Monday to Friday, 9am to 5pm.

Women’s Aid defines gaslighting as: “one tactic of coercive and controlling behaviour that aims to make survivors doubt themselves, their perception of events and even their own sanity, with devastating consequences.

“This form of abuse can be subtle, therefore, some of the signs to watch out for include: if you are second-guessing yourself all the time, feel confused, find yourself always apologising to your partner, you are having trouble making simple decisions and find yourself withholding information from friends and family so you don’t have to explain or make excuses for your partner.”

Signs of gaslighting

Solace Women’s Aid says signs can include:

• Constantly second-guessing yourself.
• Asking yourself “Am I too sensitive?” multiple times a day.
• Often feeling confused / crazy.
• Feeling as though you can’t do anything right.
• Always apologising to your partner.
• Wondering if you are a “good enough” partner.
• Withholding information from friends and family so you don’t have to explain or make excuses for or about your partner.
• Knowing something is wrong but not being able to express what it is.
• Lying to avoid the put-downs and reality twists.
• Having trouble making simple decisions.
• Having the sense you used to be a very different person – more confident, more fun-loving, and more relaxed.

Support

If you think you’re a victim of domestic abuse, there are organisations that can help:

• The National Domestic Violence   helpline, run by Refuge, which specialises in supporting women suffering domestic violence, on 0808 2000 247, 24 hours a day.
• Refuge  , which specialises in supporting women suffering domestic violence.
• ManKind Initiative  , which specialises in  supporting men, on  01823 334244, Monday – Friday, 10am-4pm.
• Men’s Advice Line  , which also specialises in supporting men, on 0808 8010327, Monday – Friday 10am-5pm.

Always call 999 if you’re in danger.

Clare's Law (also known as the Domestic Violence Disclosure Scheme) is named after Clare Wood, who was murdered by her former boyfriend in 2009.  

Clare had not been aware that her partner had a criminal background relating to domestic violence, despite him being imprisoned twice.

The Clare's law scheme was campaigned for by Clare's father who was convinced that his daughter would have been alive today had she been aware.

Clare's Law has two main elements:

Right to ask

Men and women can ask about a current or ex-partner they think might have a record of being abusive or violent. They can also ask on behalf of a close friend or relative, but the police might share information with them directly or with someone who can help protect them.

Right to know

If police checks show someone’s current or ex-partner has a history of abusive behaviour, they might tell them because they think they could be at risk.

Find out more about Clare’s Law and read an example of how it was used .

How do I request a disclosure under Clare’ Law?

Contact your local police , who will be able to explain the process.

Rape, sexual assault and sexual abuse are all types of domestic abuse. According to Rape Crisis England and Wales :

• 1 in 4 women have been sexually assaulted as an adult [6.54 million women in total]
• 1 in 18 men have been sexually assaulted as an adult [1.34 million men in total]
• 1 in 6 children have been sexually abused.

There are many myths around sexual violence and abuse , which can cause victims to feel shame or blame themselves.

If you need help, Rape Crisis has a free, 24/7 Rape & Sexual Abuse Support Line, with specialists available at any time of the day or night.

Call free on 0808 500 2222 or go to their website to start a free online chat . They also have lots of information on their website you can access.

If you are in immediate danger, always call 999.

"Psychological abuse involves the regular and deliberate use of a range of words and non-physical actions used with the purpose to manipulate, hurt, weaken or frighten a person mentally and emotionally; and/or distort, confuse or influence a person’s thoughts and actions within their everyday lives, changing their sense of self and harming their wellbeing.” 

SafeLives

“Emotional abuse includes non-physical behaviours that are meant to control, isolate, or frighten you. 

This may present in romantic relationships as threats, insults, constant monitoring, excessive jealousy, manipulation, humiliation, intimidation, and dismissiveness, among others. Sometimes emotional abuse is more obvious, like a partner yelling at you or calling you names. 

Other times it can be more subtle, like your partner acting jealous of your friends or not wanting you to hang out with someone of another gender. While these emotionally abusive behaviours do not leave physical marks, they do hurt, disempower, and traumatise the partner who is experiencing the abuse.” 

National Domestic Violence Hotline

“Physical abuse is deliberately hurting or injuring someone. This could include hitting, smacking, pushing, shaking, spitting, pinching, scalding, misusing medication, inappropriate restraint, inappropriate physical punishments, or other ways of causing physical harm.” 

Torbay and Devon Safeguarding Adults Partnership

Economical abuse can take many forms and involves an abuser restricting or having control over the other partner's access to economic resources. 

It includes controlling money or other financial assets, spending their money or not allowing them to have access to it, damaging possessions, or property, putting debt in their name, preventing them from accessing education or work, withholding child maintenance payments. 

It diminishes the victim’s capacity to support themselves and forces them to depend on their perpetrator financially.

Coercive control is an act or a pattern of acts of assault, threats, humiliation and intimidation or other abuse that is used to harm, punish, frighten or scare their victim. 

This controlling behaviour is a range of acts designed to make a person feel inferior and/or dependent. 

It isolates them from any form of support, from family and friends, exploiting them for personal gain, controlling everything they do and depriving them of their right to make their own choices of everyday activities, thoughts, feelings.

It takes away their independence, which includes enforcing rules that degrade or dehumanise the victim or threats to reveal private information about them.

We’ll listen to you, believing what you tell us, and will contact you safely, in a way and time that suits you.

We’ll treat what you tell us confidentially but, if we’re concerned that someone is at risk of serious harm, we have a duty of care to pass this onto the correct agency. Where possible we will make you aware.

We’ll be clear about what we can do and we’ll help you find specialist support. If you decide you would like to report this to the police, we can support you.

We’ll keep in regular contact with you and keep a log of everything you tell us.

We can give advice and support on restraining orders and injunctions, and make referrals to other agencies. We’ll work closely with those agencies to make sure you get the help you need.

We realise that your home is extremely important to you and one of the main reasons people don’t leave. If you need to leave your home, we can help you find a safe place to live. We can provide advice about alternative housing and give you options to enable you to make an informed choice for you and your family, this could include temporary or permanent transfers.

If you want to stay at home, we can provide additional security measures. We can also give you advice on applying for benefits and help you fill out the forms.

We take a zero-tolerance approach to domestic abuse and where possible, with your consent and safety in mind, we will hold perpetrators of abuse to account where this is appropriate to do so. We will always be clear that domestic abuse is never the fault of the victim/survivor or their children.

SNG is working towards DAHA accreditation   - which is the UK benchmark for how housing providers should respond to domestic abuse. It's the only project in the UK offering domestic abuse accreditation for the housing sector. 

By becoming DAHA accredited, we are ensuring we deliver safe and effective responses to domestic abuse, so that victims/survivors have a home of their choice, where they are safe and live fear free. 

We foster the following values and principles in the way we work and seek that those we work with align with the same values and principles.

Values:

•  Integrity
•  Collaboration
•  Empathy
•  Empowerment
•  Respect
•  Accountability

Principles:

•  Non-judgment and belief
•  Being person centred
•  Amplifying victim/survivor voice
•  Victim/survivor safety
•  Working towards a coordinated community response [CCR]